CONFLICT is a normal part of life in every family. The magic wand — if there is one — is to learn how to handle conflict in ways that are healthy rather than ways that are destructive. It is never too late to learn this important lesson — so that you may have a healthy and productive life going forward — even if you separate and end your relationship.
SHANNON FAMILY LAW can help you and your partner plan and choose the pathway best suited to your situation. How? We do this with a front-end complexity analysis — complexity of legal, financial and relationship issues.
You and your partner have a choice between “war-fare” or “peace-fare” for managing and resolving your couple-ship disputes. If you choose or allow a legal professional to guide you into “litigation”, then you are choosing “war-fare”. There are other “non-adversarial” pathways to resolution we call “peaceful ways” to resolution. How does “war-fare” versus “peace-fare” compare?
You do not have to become “enemies” even if tensions between you and your partner are high, even if you have broken off communications due to hostile feelings, even if you feel a need for revenge because you have been threatened or mistreated. Choosing “warfare” will be harmful to your children and to your physical and emotional health and could send you into bankruptcy.
The big question you and your partner face is: How do we get through the thorny thicket of “the law” with dignity, without financial ruin, and without becoming enemies?
The first choice you and your partner must make — assuming your couple-ship has or is about to break-up — is: Will we choose “war-fare” or “peace-fare”. Will we choose to resolve our conflicts in a way that is “adversarial” or in a “non-adversarial — problem solving” manner? There are two pathways to get through the thorny thicket of “the law” — “litigation” which is “adversarial” or one or a combination of the many “non-adversarial — problem solving” approaches.
Selection of legal counsel is critical at the very beginning. Unfortunately, most law schools have trained law students to practice the “litigation” or “war-fare” pathway. The system is tilted to guide conflicts into the “war-fare” pathway.
Click the links to learn more about the differences between “adversarial-litigation” and “non-adversarial — problem solving” approaches — including: “collaborative divorce“, “mediation“, ” arbitration-mediation“, “integrative family law“, “negotiation“, “kitchen table negotiations” “informal settlement conferences“, “coaching“, and “adversarial-litigation“.